“tuhanu doojya vang ban-na chaheeda hai, nahi taa na tuhada koi dost, na koi zindagi atey na hi koi bhavikh hovega. koi vi tuhade bare nahi sochega atey tusi ikkale reh jaoge.”—carl.

 kee eh gall vadha-charha ke dassi gayi hai? shayad. par fir vi kayi lok carl vallo zikar keete gaye sittya to bachan layi kujh vi karan layi tyaar rehnde han. kee tuhade bare vi eh gall sach hai? eh lekh dost banaun da vadiya tareeka labhan vich tuhadi madad karega.

•  lok kyo chahunde han ki dooje ohna nu pasand karan?

•  tuhanu kee pata hona chaheeda hai?

•  tuhade hani kee kehnde han?

•   kyoki oh doojya de dost ban-na chahunde han. “social-media te mai kujh lokaa diya photoa dekhiya jo kite bahar ghumman-firan gaye san te oh vi mere to bagair. eh dekh ke mai sochya ki mere vich kee kharabi si. mai ehi sochdi rehi ki shayad mai ohna de layak nahi si.”—natalie.

   zara socho: kee tuhanu kade idda lagga ki doosre tuhanu pasand nahi karde? tusi kee keeta taaki oh tuhanu pasand karan?

•   kyoki oh alag nazar nahi aauna chahunde. “mere mummy-papa mainu phone nahi rakhan dinde. jado koi mera phone number puchhda te mai kehndi ha ki mere kol phone nahi hai. eh sunn ke oh kehnde han: ‘kee! tu kinne saala di hai?’ jado mai dassdi ha ki mai 13 saala di ha, taa oh mere vall taras bhariya nazra naal dekhde han.”—merry.

   zara socho: tuhade maapya vallo laayi gayi kehrri pabandi karke tuhanu lagg sakda hai ki tusi doosrya nalo vakhre ho? pabandi laggan te tuhada ravaiya keho jeha hunda hai?

•   kyoki oh nahi chahunde ki koi ohna nu tang kare. “school vich bache ohna nu pasand nahi karde jo alag tareeke naal pesh aaunde, alag tareeke naal bolde ja itho tak ki alag tareeke naal bhagti karde han. ihna kaarna karke tusi ohna da nishana bannde ho.”—olivia.

   zara socho: kee vakhre nazar aaun karke kade tuhade naal badsalooki keeti gayi hai? tusi os vele kee keeta?

•   kyoki oh apne dost guaauna nahi chahunde. “mai jinha naal vi hundi si, mai ohna vang hi bannan di koshish kardi si. mai ohna vang hi gall kardi si. mai odo vi hassdi si jado koi hase vali gall vi nahi si hundi. jado meriya saheliya kise da mazaak udaundiya hundiya san, taa mai vi ohna naal ral ke mazaak udaundi si, bhave ki mainu pata si ki idda karan naal os viakti nu dukh pahunchda si.”—rachel.

   zara socho: tuhade layi eh gall kinni ku maene rakhdi hai ki tuhade hani tuhanu pasand karan? kee tusi kade apne haniya vang gall ja kamm karan di koshish keeti hai taaki oh tuhanu pasand karan?

•   doojya di nakal karan da ulta asar ho sakda hai. kyo? kyoki lokaa nu aksar tuhade dhaung da pata lagg janda hai. 20 saala da brian kehnda hai: “jado mai class de bachya samne oh bannan di koshish karda ha jo mai nahi ha, taa mai oh mainu ghatt hi pasand karde han. mai sikhya ki vadiya hai ki asi udda de hi rahiye, jidda de asi ha kyoki lokaa nu pata lagg janda hai ki asi nakal karan di koshish kar rahe hunde ha.”

   sahi tareeka kee hai? socho ki tuhade layi sabh to ziada zaroori kee hai. bible kehndi hai: “ziada zaroori galla nu dhyaan vich rakho.” (filippiya 1:10) is layi khud nu puchho: ‘mere layi kee ziada zaroori hai, ohna lokaa naal dosti karni jinha diya kadra-keemta mere to alag han ja udda da hi rehna jidda da mai ha?’

   “doojya vang bannan di koshish karni bekar hai. idda karan naal na taa lok tuhanu ziada pasand karange te na hi tusi hor change insaan banoge.”—james.

•   doojya nu khush karan de chakkar vich tuhadi shakhsiyat te asar pai sakda hai. tusi “doojya nu khush karan de chakkar” vich oh karan layi tyaar ho sakde ho jo dooje tuhade to karauna chahunde han. jermi naa da naujavan kehnda hai: “mai kujh lokaa naal ghulan-milan layi sabh kujh karda hunda si, bhave idda karan naal mera naa kharab ho sakda si. par mai sirf is layi karda si taaki oh mainu pasand karan. idda karan naal mai ohna de hatha di kathputli bann gaya.”

   sahi tareeka kee hai? apne aale-duaale mutabak apna rang badlan vale girgit vang na bano, sago apnia kadra-keemta jaano te ohna mutabak challo. bible bilkul sahi kehndi hai: “bahutya de magar na lagg.”—kooch 23:2.

   “mai ohna cheeza nu pasand karan di koshish keeti jo mere dost karde san jive ki gaane, gema, kappde, natak atey makeup . . . mai ohna vargi ban-na chahundi si. mainu laggda ki mere kamma to sirf mere dosta nu hi nahi, sago mainu te baaki sarya nu vi is gall da ehsas ho gaya ki mai doojya di nakal kardi si. akheer mai khaleepan te ikallapan mehsoos keeta atey mainu eh vi nahi si pata ki mai kaun si. nale mai kee pasand kardi si ja kee sochdi si. mai sikhya ki jinha nu vi asi milde ha, zaroori nahi ki oh sare sanu pasand karan. par is da eh vi matlab nahi ki asi dost banaune chhadd deyiye. bas dheeraj rakho atey yaad rakho ki dost banaun atey samajhdar bannan vich sama laggda hai.”—melinda.

•   doojya vallo pasand keete jaan layi keetiya koshisha da asar tuhade chaal-chalan te pai sakda hai. chris naa da naujavan dassda hai ki os de rishtedar naal idda hi hoya. kris kehnda hai, “oh chahunda si ki dooje os nu pasand karan jis karke oh ajehe kamm karan lagg pya jo oh nahi karda hunda si, jive ki nashe karne. os nu nashe karan di buri lat lagg gayi te os di zindagi lagbhag poori tarha barbaad ho gayi.”

   sahi tareeka kee hai? ohna lokaa to door raho jinha di boli atey chaal-chalan to pata laggda ki ohna de naitik myaar sahi nahi han. bible kehndi hai: “budhvana da sangi budhvan bann janda hai, par moorkha de saathi nu dukh hovega.”—kahauta 13:20.

   “kade-kade pehel kar ke doojya vich ghulan-milan di koshish karni vadiya gall hai. par tuhanu sahi galla de khilaf ja ke idda bilkul nahi karna chaheeda. change lok tuhanu udda hi kabool karange jidda de tusi ho.”—melanie.

   sujhaa: nave lokaa nu mildya atey dost banaudya sirf ohna lokaa vall hi dhyaan na dyo jo ohna cheeza vich dilchaspi rakhde han jinha vich tusi rakhde ho. ohna lokaa naal vi dosti karo jinha diya kadra-keemta yani dharmik vishvas, naitik myaar atey sanskar tuhade naal mel khande hon.